Romance can be an intimidating word. Thanks to high-budget chick flicks and imaginative romance novels, it feels like the bar for romance keeps getting higher and higher. The truth is, romance is not as complicated as it seems. It’s not particularly elaborate, expensive, or theatrical. It does, however, take a bit of planning and thought; but overall, romance comes down to five basic things: personalization, presentation, variety, planning, and a special twist.
Say your sweetheart knows you love baseball and decides their next romantic gesture should involve that particular sport. If they bought you a random jersey from a random team you might appreciate it, but it wouldn’t have half the impact as them buying you a jersey with your favorite player’s name on it, right? Relationships involve knowing and appreciating another person for who they are. The best way to show someone you adore them is to include who they are in your romantic gestures. What do they like? What do they dislike? What makes them happy? What styles are they into? What do they prefer? Pay close attention to who your sweetheart is – after all, that’s who you fell in love with.
Buying a woman a dozen roses and handing them to her is romantic, yes. But how much more romantic is it to take those dozen roses and placing them on the ground one by one, leading from her front door to a love letter on the bed? Presentation is a big part of romance. It doesn’t always have to be over-the-top, but a little extra thought in presentation adds to the quality of the gesture.
Dinner and a movie is – in all honesty – a pretty solid date. The reason dinner and a movie gets so much flack is because many people make it a default date, failing to put in the effort to keep variety in their dating life. Variety is a huge key in being romantic. Expensive dates need to be balanced out with cheap dates, serene strolls on the beach need to be balanced with adrenaline-pumping roller coaster rides, double dates need to balanced out with intimate dates for two. Keep a date journal or calendar of the dates you go on, paying special attention to repetition and style. It’s easy to hit a plateau in your dating life, so keep a record to make sure that doesn’t happen.
Spontaneity is incredibly romantic… sometimes. But when spontaneity is the only thing holding together your date night life, it can become dull fast. A lot of time is wasted when no one has a decision for the evening. The reason this is saddening is because planning a date or romantic interlude is incredibly easy. All it takes is a little research and a few notes. Grab the nearest newspaper and look for upcoming events. Look on the internet for attractions pertaining to your sweetheart’s interests. Look through romantic idea books and websites and write what ideas you like. Look at holidays coming up over the next few months and see what romance is inspired by it. Dates are simple enough to plan for weeks in advance, and they turn out better when you do so. (Note: you can plan something a week ahead and still make it look spontaneous.) Putting in the extra effort of planning ahead makes the date more romantic, helps the date run smoother, and it ensures that your romantic life is getting the proper attention it deserves.
A Special Twist
Adding a twist to a romantic gesture easily increases its romantic value. There are many books that offer romantic ideas and gestures, and they should not only inspire you to be romantic, but to be creative. Think about how you can put a twist on the romantic ideas other people have come up with. This is romantic innovation. Twists can be as simple as replacing the words in an idea. For example, instead of breakfast in bed, make it lunch in bed. Instead of a one dozen roses, make it four dozen roses. Instead of an Italian dinner for two, make it an Italian vacation for two! Twists are not incredibly difficult to come up with and they make a huge difference in the quality of your romantic gesture.
Note that all of these elements do not need to be incorporated all at once. That would be exhausting! The idea is to look at what your options are and then make that romantic gesture your own. Romance is no place for laziness. Even if you don’t consider yourself a creative person, you can be creative in romance. Your relationship will be all the better for it, too.