Women are attracted to the “bad boys.” So much, in fact, that they’ll get themselves tangled up in horrible relationships, and shut out any advice or word of caution in order to keep what they are attracted to.

But it’s been my thought that there are certain qualities a bad boy has that women like, yet don’t quite understand what it is they are really attracted to. Let’s look at some of the typical bad boy qualities women find attractive and expose them for what they actually might be.

He doesn’t listen to anyone and doesn’t let anything stop him.
Actual quality you’re attracted to: He has his own mind
No woman wants a “yes” man. And that’s what makes the bad boy so attractive. He’ll tell his friends no, his parents no, and will even say no to you if he wants. Women want men who act like leaders and make solid decisions. The problem is that the bad boy doesn’t even listen to wise advice and doesn’t really consider the feelings of others. A man should make his decisions based on what is best, not on what he feels at the time. And he should always seek the council of God when he has to make a decision.

He’s aloof and somewhat anti-social, but you see his softer side.
Actual quality you’re attracted to: Intimacy
You see this quality in the movies a lot. The heroine reaches the heart of the bad boy and sees a light in him that no one else sees. The attraction in this is that the heroine has an intimate relationship with this guy that no one else has. And that’s a good thing to want! Marriage includes having a special relationship with your spouse that you can’t really share with anyone else. And maybe, on some level, women want that special relationship because we want to be the most important relationship a guy has. Your spouse should be your most important relationship, only 2nd to your relationship with Christ. But if no one else sees this “light” in your guy, it’s probably because he hasn’t reached his full maturity yet. It’s not your job to bring him to full maturity. It’s his.

He and his motorcycle hit the open road whenever they feel like it.
Actual quality you’re attracted to: Adventure and spontaneity
No woman wants a boring relationship! Every relationship should have open adventures and tons of spontaneity. It keeps it romantic and fun. The bad boy, however, will probably use adventure and spontaneity to get away from you when he’s in a bad mood instead of including you in it.

He’s possessive and somewhat violent.
Actual quality you’re attracted to: Protection
Even the women that can defend themselves want a man that can protect and defend them when necessary. Sometimes the outside world gets a little out of hand, and a woman wants to know she can depend on a man to back her up with the waters get choppy. The moment of fearlessness a man shows when things get dangerous is contagious; she’ll continue feeling fearless as well. But the bad boy normally is looking for fights that aren’t necessary, and will sooner or later turn his anger towards you. A violent and possessive man is not a mature man; he has no self-control. What you really want is a man who will protect what important: his family and loved ones.

I assure you, ladies, there are men out there with the qualities you’re really looking for that aren’t the lost, troubled bad boy who is more of a dangerous wild card than a solid safety net. Don’t cheat yourself out of what is best for the “bad boy” you are attracted to. The bad boy is bound to disappoint or even turn on you, but what is best will pleasantly surprise you.